Memorable Movie Quotes

First off, do you know the difference between a monologue and a soliloquy? I just looked it up and the trick to remember is that a "monologue is, literally, half of a dialogue (mono- = one, dia- = two.)" so there may be one character going on at length, but there are other characters present and not interrupting. My favorite monologue of all time is Father Barry's "that's a crucifixion" sermon in On the Waterfront (1950), followed by Barbara Novak's "there is no Barbara Novak" speech at the end of Down with Love (2003). A soliloquy can be short or long, but other characters aren't hearing it, just the audience. Often characters are just thinking out loud or talking to themselves, but I love it when characters sometimes "break the fourth wall," or speak directly to the audience. The first movie examples that come to my mind are the racial slurs on Do the Right Thing (1989) and the voice-over narration on Goodfellas (1990). There seems to be an overlap between narration and soliloquy, of which I have better examples below. The following quotes are not all from monologues or soliloquies, nor are they my favorites. They're a sampling of some movie lines that persistently pop into my head from time to time.

Classics

"You can't handle the truth!" - A Few Good Men (1992)

"That'll do pig." - Babe (1995)

"You had me at 'hello.'" - Jerry Maguire (1996)

Comedic

"Lane, I've been going to this high school for seven and a half years. I'm no dummy." - Better Off Dead (1985)

"Dear Lord, we ask that you bless this food to the nourishment of our bodies. And we ask forgiveness, Lord, for the fornication that Mr. Sprock and me committed this morning on this very table." - Where the Heart Is (1999)

"Parents: Please do not leave your children unattended. All unattended children will be eaten." - Ice Age: The Meltdown (2006)

Dramatic

"When I turn my hat around, it’s like a switch going on. And I love that feeling. I feel like a machine. Kinda like a truck." - Over the Top (1987)

"You see every drink of liquor you take kills a thousand brain cells. Now that doesn't much matter 'cos we got billions more. And first the sadness cells die so you smile real big. And then the quiet cells go so you just say everything real loud for no reason at all. That's okay because the stupid cells go next, so everything you say is real smart. And finally, come the memory cells. These are tough sons of bitches to kill." - The Legend of Bagger Vance (2000)

"The only rules that really matter are these: what a man can do and what a man can't do. For instance, you can accept that your father was a pirate and a good man or you can't. But pirate is in your blood, boy, so you'll have to square with that some day. And me, for example, I can let you drown, but I can't bring this ship into Tortuga all by me onesies, savvy? So, can you sail under the command of a pirate, or can you not?" - Pirates of the Caribbean (2003)

Horrific

"Sometimes that shark he looks right into ya. Right into your eyes. And, you know, the thing about a shark... he's got lifeless eyes. Black eyes. Like a doll's eyes. When he comes at ya, doesn't seem to be living... until he bites ya, and those black eyes roll over white and then... ah then you hear that terrible high-pitched screamin'. The ocean turns red, and despite all the poundin' and the hollerin', they all come in and they... rip you to pieces." - Jaws (1975)

"Have you any idea what it takes to kill a human being, Mr. Withers? I don't mean one brute bashing in another brute's skull out of primitive passion. I mean the measured dispassionate action that comes from absolute clarity of mind, transcends rational thought. The kind of action that springs from absolute necessity, unclouded by the restraints of conscience, mercy, pity. The kind of action that allows one to take a common, ordinary hammer and with clinical precision split a skull so cleanly that the cranium cracks right through the medulla, allowing the claw of the hammer to be used to pry back the skull cleanly, exposing the brain while the subject remains alive, even aware. Such a man is to be envied, reveared, and much feared, never paralyzed by impotence of will." - From the Hip (1987)

"We see a deadly sin on every street corner, in every home, and we tolerate it. We tolerate it because it's common, it's trivial. We tolerate it morning, noon, and night. Well, not anymore. I'm setting the example. What I've done is going to be puzzled over and studied and followed... forever." - Se7en (1995)

Narration

"Civilized man refused to adapt himself to his environment; instead, he adapted his environment to suit him. So he built cities, roads, vehicles, machinery, and he put up power lines to run his labour-saving devices. But somehow he didn't know where to stop. The more he improved his surroundings to make life easier, the more complicated he made it. So now his children are sentenced to 10-15 years of school, just to learn how to survive in this complex and hazardous habitat they were born into. And civilized man, who refused to adapt to his surroundings, now finds he has to adapt and re-adapt every hour of the day to his self-created environment." - The Gods Must Be Crazy (1980)

"Girlfriends barfed on boyfriends. Kids barfed on their parents. A fat lady barfed in her purse. The Donnelley twins barfed on each other, and the Women's Auxiliary barfed all over the Benevolent Order of Antelopes. And Lardass just sat back and enjoyed what he'd created - a complete and total barf-o-rama!" - Stand By Me (1986)

"Not another one among us would have ever in a million years even for a million dollars have the guts to put the moves on the lifeguard. He did. He had kissed a woman. And he had kissed her long and good." - The Sandlot (1993)

Profound Observations

"Don't matter if they're skinny, fat, blond or blue. If a woman is willing to give you her love, Harvard, it's the greatest gift in the world. Makes you taller, makes you smarter, makes your teeth shine. Boy, oh, boy, women are perfect." - With Honors (1994)

"Évian is 'naïve' spelled backward." - Reality Bites (1994)

"Yuck, the maudlin music of the university station. Wah, wah, wah, suck! What is it with college and crybaby music?" - Clueless (1995)

Soliloquies

Alvy Singer: (to audience) "Whaddya do when you get stuck in a movie line with a guy like this behind you?"
Man in Theatre Line: "Wait a minute, why can't I give my opinion? It's a free country!"
Alvy Singer: "He can give it... do you have to give it so loud? I mean, aren't you ashamed to pontificate like that? And the funny part of it is, Marshall McLuhan, you don't know anything about Marshall McLuhan!"
Man in Theatre Line: "Oh, really? Well, it just so happens I teach a class at Columbia called 'TV, Media and Culture.' So I think my insights into Mr. McLuhan, well, have a great deal of validity!"
Alvy Singer: "Oh, do ya? Well, that's funny, because I happen to have Mr. McLuhan right here, so, so, yeah, just let me..."
(pulls McLuhan out from behind a nearby poster)
Alvy Singer: "Come over here for a second... tell him!"
Marshall McLuhan: "I heard what you were saying! You know nothing of my work! You mean my whole fallacy is wrong. How you got to teach a course in anything is totally amazing!"
Alvy Singer: "Boy, if life were only like this!" - Annie Hall (1977)

"Not that I condone fascism, or any -ism for that matter. -Ism's in my opinion are not good. A person should not believe in an -ism, he should believe in himself. I quote John Lennon, 'I don't believe in Beatles, I just believe in me.' Good point there. After all, he was the walrus. I could be the walrus. I'd still have to bum rides off people." - Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986)

"I'm 23. Remember how old 23 seemed when you were little? I mean, I thought people were going to be travelling in airlocks and I would have five kids. Here I am. 23. Things are, um... They're basically the same. I think, um, time is running out to do something bizarre. Somewhere around 25, bizarre becomes immature." - Singles (1992)

Twists

James Bond: "Vodka-martini."
Bartender: "Shaken or stirred?"
James Bond: "Do I look like I give a damn?" - Casino Royale (2006)

"Get your stinking hands off me, you damn dirty human!" - Planet of the Apes (2001)

"It wasn't the airplanes. It was beauty killed the beast." - King Kong (1933)