I once tried to tell a guy at church that I didn't know there was to be a third
Pirates of the Caribbean until the end credits of the second one. Almost ignoring my whole point, he asked "was it funny?" He continued, "the only thing I want to know about movies anymore is if they're funny." What a rating system. By that same standard, nearly every current prime time television series would be lost (no pun intended) on him. It's brilliant! I have to say he'd be better off for it. I don't watch TV. Don't get me wrong, we own a TV, but it's not HD, and no cable either. With bunny ears, we can get ABC and CBS, but that's only until the big switch.
Why do I hate TV, you ask? I don't, really. We actually got a free month of cable back when we moved to San Diego and out of all those channels, I found myself only watching
Seinfeld reruns that I could get without cable. Hmmm,
Lost versus
Seinfeld. What's the difference between
Lost and
Seinfeld? Why, one's funny, that's what. From what I can tell and correct me if I'm wrong, most of the shows on primetime are not funny and like my friend, I only want funny if there's commercials involved. At the theater I can do drama. On DVD I can do drama, because I can do entire season marathons. But on TV,
no drama. Reality TV is not funny to me. Untalented performers on contest shows are not funny to me. Sports aren't funny to anyone, are they? Is the problem just me? Then I talked to a guy at work. He loves TV dramas. His favorites are
Dexter (dark funny),
House (mean funny) and
Smallville (I've only seen the Aquaman and The Flash episodes, which were hokey funny; are the Green Arrow and Supergirl episodes funny too?). Anyway, I told him I had just watched the season one finale of
The Big Bang Theory (geeky funny) on DVD and it made me excited for the first episode of the season two. He replied by spoiling the plot of that first episode (which premiered weeks ago) and followed up by noting that that's the only show he currently "follows." We then tried to think back to what the last shows that we "followed" were. What was the last show YOU watched every week, not counting reruns, downloads, or DVDs?
Here are the last five TV shows that I followed as they premiered:1.
30 Rock (the funniest show since 2006) I can't remember if I saw the first episode as a free download on iTunes or if our NBC was still working and I made time for it because I wanted to see Alec Baldwin do a sitcom, or d) none of the above. I do remember
Entertainment Weekly magazine made a big deal when it first came out. Since then, we've watched each episode as it came up on NBC's website. Other shows that I've downloaded the first episode for free from iTunes are
Lost (not funny),
Weeds (very funny, but I don't think I've seen all the DVDs available),
The Starter Wife (not funny enough to seek out any other episodes), and
Burn Notice (doesn't look funny, but that's not why I haven't played it yet).

2.
Spin City (1996 and funny to me) Notice the ten year difference between this and the show above. The reason for that is mostly that I was out of the country from 1998-2000 and I didn't watch any TV during that time. When I returned, I figured I had gone two years without it, so why not two more, or four, or 40? As you can see, I started up again, but I don't think I'll ever fully comprehend
That '70s Show, or
Dawson's Creek, or
Will & Grace, which all came out while I was gone. I didn't see
Friends end or the
Seinfeld series finale either (funny?), but that's ok because I was only familiar with those shows from reruns in the first place.
3.
X-Files (1993 sorry, not funny) I didn't stick around for all the seasons, but I definitely followed the first few. Five years prior to this I had followed
Unsolved Mysteries because it was mostly about the supernatural in the beginning. As it gave way to real world crimes, I lost interest, so
X-Files offered a new way to fill the void. I can't remember how long I stayed with it or why I stopped. Some Saturday morning cartoons (very serious) that I may have followed but I can't remember were
Talespin (1990),
Darkwing Duck (1991),
Batman: The Animated Series and
X-Men (both 1992).
4.
Saturday Morning Videos (1990) was an extension of NBC's
Friday Night Videos (1983-2002) where I watched the latest from Marky Mark and Roxette (funny) without Mtv. That's where I first saw Depeche Mode and got into the KLF. NBC also debuted
The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air (1990) and
Blossom (1991) around this same time (both stupid funny), but I'm not sure I watched those every week.
5. Before that, it was something on Fox (always good for a laugh): either
The Simpsons (1989),
In Living Color (1990), or
Married... with Children (1987), which I didn't start until after the Jefferson character. After Disney's original Sunday night movies stopped, my mom started watching
Life Goes On (1989 not funny), which my brothers and I couldn't have cared less about, but the alternative was one of the worst shows of all time,
America's Most Wanted (1988 and NOT funny), unless of course we snuck into our bedroom and watched Fox without our parents realizing what we were watching.
The last five shows I'm caught up on thanks to the advent of DVD:1.
The Big Bang Theory (2007) funny
2.
Ergo Proxy (2006; 2007 in English) alas, not funny
3.
My Name is Earl (2005) funny
4.
Teen Titans (2003) kinda funny
5.
Cowboy Bebop (1998; 2001 in English) funny in a weird way
The five years that I followed ABC's Friday prime time block (which officially started calling itself "TGIF" on October 13, 1992):
1.
Max Headroom (1987-88) was America's turn with a British movie concept, also seen in
Back to the Future Part II. It played after Full House and Mr. Belvedere and replaced
Sidekicks (Chuck Norris
Karate Kid ripoff) and
Sledge Hammer! (
Dirty Harry meets
Get Smart) from the year before. My wife's favorite show of all time,
Perfect Strangers, still aired on Wednesdays at this point.
2.
Perfect Strangers, Full House, Mr. Belvedere, and
Just the Ten of Us (1988-89) was the inaugural sequence and the whole lineup had hosts, originally just the Balki and Larry characters from
Perfect Strangers. One by one, each show would be cancelled or moved until none were left for the fall of 1992, but by then I was gone too.
3.
Mr. Belvedere was the first to go, replaced by
Family Matters (1989-90). Starting this season, characters from the other shows hosted and as mentioned above, the name and logo appeared.
4.
Just the Ten of Us was replaced by
Going Places (1990-91). I don't remember the latter at all, which may be evidence that I was already slipping away from "TGIF." Apparently it starred Heather Locklear and Alan Ruck, the guy who played Cameron on
Ferris Bueller's Day Off (the movie, not the show; yes, there was a TV version; no, it wasn't any good and in no way could compete with
Parker Lewis Can't Lose, my favorite show of all time; in case you really didn't know, they made Ferris Bueller blonde!)
5. I actually liked
Step by Step (a
Brady Bunch for the '90s with Suzanne Somers) and
Look Who's Talking ripoff,
Baby Talk (1991-92) better than
Full House and
Going Places, which they replaced. My thing with
Full House is that they kept added rooms and families as if the widower and his daughters weren't enough, and in the end it crumbled like the Roman empire.
Perfect Strangers was the only show left from the starting lineup in 1991. I could say that
Dinosaurs moving from Wednesdays was what killed "TGIF" for me in the fall of 1992, but that annoying, stupid show was just the straw that broke the camel's half-missing back. I had already followed
Full House to Tuesdays with
Home Improvement, Roseanne, and
Coach the year before, so that just became my new TV night. Even though
Dinosaurs lasted a single season on Fridays,
Boy Meets World and
Hangin' with Mr. Cooper made sure that I stayed away. I'll admit I did take a peek another four years later, but
Sabrina, the Teenage Witch and
Clueless (a worse movie remake than
Ferris Bueller) are where I draw the generation gap between Gen-X and Generation Why.