This Is My Last Movie Review

"Unbeknownst to most moviegoers, the saddest story in films concerns the emergence of brutal scorekeeper critics." (film critic Manny Farber in 1965, as quoted this year by film critic J. Hoberman, Harpers magazine, July 2010)

"For the past month, I've been trying to fully engage with the social layer. I joined and contributed to such services and platforms as Quora, Twitter, Foursquare, Facebook, Blippy, Swipely, DailyBooth, Goodreads, Daytum, etc., etc. I tried to tweet five times a day. I gave two sites access to my credit cards so I could share my purchases with friends. I did my best to check in wherever I went on Foursquare. And what it all made me feel, mostly, was stupid. And anxious - that I didn't have enough people following me and then that I was the kind of person who wants people to follow him." (Bartholomew Cooke, GQ magazine, December 2010)

The Social Network (four and a half stars total) has the second best soundtrack of the year, the first being Inception, which is all about the music, in my opinion. Just based on those movies' trailers, I'd already awarded a blue star to each, long before I ever saw either one. The music on Inception's trailer instantly inspired parodies on YouTube (including an acapella one) and The Social Network's trailer earned a record deal for some Belgian women's choir (Scala & Kolacny), all because of their version of Radiohead's "Creep." The trailer for Catfish, AKA "the other Facebook movie," even tried subtly connecting itself to The Social Network by playing a children's choir (Langley Schools) version of The Beach Boys' "Good Vibrations." I mention this for my own future reference, but also to point out that music is very important to me, moreso than story or visuals in a movie, therefore the different-colored stars under my "movie review guide" are not all equal. Whether that's a flaw in my system or a flaw in my use of the system is up to you. This applies to The Social Network in that Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg created a system for communication that, according to the movie, is either flawed by its very nature or at the very least, used by some for very flawed reasons. I'll admit that I don't have a Facebook account nor do I know the exact defintion of the term "algorithm" but that doesn't prevent me from appreciating a movie derived from these things. The story is metafictional enough to comment on itself with lines like "there's got to be a land speed record for talking" (the dialogue and pacing require multiple viewings). I've heard people complain about the ratio of fact to fiction in this unapologetic "biopic," but they do make it easy to tell the difference whenever there's a melodramatic scarf burning or cinematic workplace violence. If reality is what you want, look no further than the irony of the special effects "twins." Where most movies would have stopped short with that "achievement" by itself, this movie gave each twin a unique personality. Now that's how you use special effects for the story's sake, and not the other way around! But back to music, when "Baby You're a Rich Man" started playing over the end credits, I knew one era had ended and another had begun. Much like the movie's protagonist, The Beatles' back catalog has spent far too much time in litigation, but if these kids with their new-fangled Webhacktweeterwalls can save the past from itself and get oldies playing on the big screen again, maybe they can save the future too.